Quote-Post

I am probably most widely known for my famous "Quote-Posts", mostly on Facebook and MySpace, but I thought it'd be funny to make a quote-post on my blogspot. Why not give someone a reason to laugh?

Crap. Now I gotta think of some funny conversations...

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"Time to get up."
"Who says?" (muffled)
"The clock says."
"That clock was made in China. It knows nothing whatsoever about the sleeping habits of Texans."

--

"Why do organizations give awards and medals to DEAD PEOPLE?!"
"So their families will quit whining."

--

"It's the PEDAL ON THE RIGHT! Push it DOWN!" (Uncle Dave, driving.)

--

"Allie's goofing off." -Dave to a man who stepped in the room right when Dave hit me with a rag.
"Whatever." -me
"Oh, I know." -man looks at Dave, "I had a daughter. She just went to college, but I understand what you mean." (nods)
Silence.
"What he means by that is he knows it's really you being the trouble maker." -me to Dave.

--

"Do you live here or are you visiting?" -some stranger I was being introduced to
"Oh I'm-"
"She's living here. She just doesn't know it yet." -Judy, church secretary.

--

"Let's disco-aaaaaaah!"

--

"HELP! I'm outnumbered! I'm the only girl!" -me to Lindsey
"Hey. I have a feminine side, too." -Nick, indignant and offended.
"We don't want to see it." -me

--

"You're persecuting me." -Nick
"Yeah, well, if you ask you, you're ALWAYS being persecuted." -me

--

"There's coffee in the kitchen if you want it."
"And if I don't, it'll go away, right?"

--

"GOOD MORNING! How are you?"
"You woke me up, dragged me here, and you really expect a cheerful response to that?"

--

"Good grief, Margaret, it's not like they're going to tie you to a pole and burn you while dancing!" -me
"What? That was the first thing we planned on doing! That's what you call an Alaskan cook-off." -Dave
"Noooooo!" -Meg
"Alright, alright. We'll wait till the second night to do that." -Dave

--

"Warm milk? CALVIN! He's drinking WARM MILK." -me, on the phone
"So?" -Calvin
"No, no. You're supposed to be on my side here!"

--

There are tons more, but these are the only ones I could find. You got lucky. ^^